Effective Listeners #1

Last week I had this communication training Tech support (TS or service desk). Why tech support? TS is an important department in the organisation. They are the first line to contact client (i.e. colleagues, professional or patients) and they are the image of the organisation. I don’t work in the tech support, I am the system manager of Cyberlab and I contact & support Cyberlab users daily. I would like to do better and I would love to get some extra tools and technique to perform my tasks effectively. Here we go, I signed in for this training and it was a great present and pleasant experience for me.

I also realized that the more we work and switchtasking at the same time, the worse our listening gets. In fact people found it more and more difficult to listen carefully while they doing many different things at the same time.

The art of being an effective communicator, be it at home or work doesn’t just come from effective talking but also from effective listening. I have to listen to what the other person is saying and then accordingly, but not instantly, react to that… Let’s talk about the common barriers that hinder effective listening, and what we can do to change that to make us better listeners.

{Effective Listener #1 Fill in the gap and assumptions}

Say someone is talking to me about their bad experience of the system – amidst their long-winded tale of unpleasant, system-not-working experience; I switch off and start thinking about the solution, how I can improve this or simply tell the user to read the friendly manual. I basically tune out of what the other person is saying. The result? I missed out on their experience and filled in the gaps with my experience – letting me have a rather incorrect picture of what had actually happened to the talker. This is the law of closure, where we tend to fill in any gaps in what others are saying, with my own assumptions or experiences – which leads to an incorrect conclusion of it all.

The obvious solutions are to prepare when the user rings me, stop what I do at that moment, to prepare my tools/information and to breath in and out, then I really listen to what the other person is saying and keep my own experience aside for another day’s story – When I feel I am getting distracted, ask a question or two … to ask and to record.. summarize what I heard and verify this with the talker. It’s my responsibility to provide service and do my job. This way I create care, clarity, partnership and cooperation.
{My Successes}

  1. with My value of joy, I was an early bird, I sat down and prepared the new theme of my blog. I am excited.
  2. with My value of inspiration, I got extra tools & presents from the TS training and it inspired me to write this Effective Listeners series. <Woo Hoo> Stay tuned guys ❤
  3. with My value of commitment, I gained 2 kgs from my Milan trip, <Shit!> Well, I recognized my CPs, I didn’t play the game and I fell back to my old routine <stuffing & didn’t listen to my body> It was time to correct.
  4. with My value of love, SLCTA! I started to correct last Monday and I lost this extra 2 kgs in 2 days. I went back to my target weight, I stopped stuffing when I was full and I had the outfit tools in my pocket, use it !! I don’t plan to go back to my old weight and I enjoy my life style now.
  5. with My value of love, I spent time for myself. I spent time for my blog. I spent time to create happiness for me.
  6. with My value of clarity, I planned our day up front, we will have 2 VIPs with us today and I am excited.
  7. with My value of love, I shared my outfit successes with my sweet baboo, I cared and I shared. I was grateful that he did this training with me.
  8. with My value of joy, I was happy to see the boys, they were lovely and my fun day started.
  9. with My value of clarity, I clarified some ground rules with the boys, this way I created some peace, structure & care with the boys. <my house my rules>
  10. with My value of care, my glasses dropped on the ground and I didn’t see it. This kind gentleman screamed and let me know. I appreciated his care and thank you so much.
  11. with My value of happiness, we hanged out in Omniversum, we enjoyed this funny movie and we had fun.
  12. with My value of fun, we had yummy lunch with them, they did well and we had some laugh.
  13. with My value of joy, we enjoyed our ice cream treat after the movie, we enjoyed the sun and it was great to play outside.
  14. with My value of clarity, we agreed to take some good rest, we will have more fun tomorrow and they were lovely. I was a happy auntie.
  15. with My value of happiness, I was happy to have hang out with the boys. I was happy for my sweet baboo’s support and care. I was happy to have quality time with my loves.

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