Effective Listeners #3

Last week I had this communication training Tech support (TS or service desk). Why tech support? TS is an important department in the organization. They are the first line to contact client (i.e. colleagues, professional or patients) and they are the image of the organization. I don’t work in the tech support, I am the system manager of Cyberlab and I contact & support users daily. Sometimes I have no clue how I would do better and I would love to get some extra tools and technique to perform my tasks effectively. Here we go, I signed in for this training and it was a great present and pleasant experience for me.

I also realized that the more we work and switch tasking at the same time, the worse our listening gets. In fact people found it more and more difficult to listen carefully while they doing many different things at the same time.

The art of being an effective communicator, be it at home or work doesn’t just come from effective talking but also from effective listening. I have to listen to what the other person is saying and then accordingly, but not instantly, react to that… Let’s talk about the common barriers that hinder effective listening, and what we can do to change that to make us better listeners.
{EL #3 Selective Listening}

Many times, I believe what I want and get attached to my beliefs as well. Meaning I become rigid in my principles. What happens then is that when any conversation goes against our principles or beliefs, it gets filtered out.
Say I am on a weight loss program and am drinking at least 2 L of water daily. I believe this to be healthy but others may have a different viewpoint that I may be overdoing it when I do so… But when they talk to me about this, I basically stop listening and end up missing out on some valuable advice or information; I might wish I had listened to, at a later stage.

The solution is to be a tad more open up myself, throw my biased mind aside, it wasn’t a criticism and at least listen to other viewpoints, and then make an informed decision about the step I am going to take. I realized that I don’t know what I don’t know and I might get some new ideas and new insight during this conversation.

{My Successes}

  1. with My value of joy, I slept in on Whit Monday, it was a beautiful day and I enjoyed my day off.
  2. with My value of care, it was time to do some gardening and it was a good moment to take care of our garden.
  3. with My value of insight, I realized that short and direct email isn’t blunt at all. It is clear & effective and this is my communication style! I was clear, I asked questions and I gave feedback … what is wrong about it? When I trust me, then I listen to my gut feeling and go for it. < My 2 principles: stay friendly and professional, care and partnership>
  4. with My value of joy, My sis told me that I was on the local paper #parool when I was in this Shell event “generation discover bright ideas hub” and huh? It was funny. Am I the celeb in NL now? <wahahaha …>
  5. with My value of clarity, the kind lady asked for permission if they can make pictures when I was in the hub, < yeah sure> I appreciated her support & clarity.
  6. with My value of love, small thing is relevant. I loved to kiss my loves. I loved to listen to him. I loved to share what I think. I loved to hug him. I am loved by this big huggy bear, thank you so much.
  7. with My value of care, I worked in our jungle. It was time to take action, I had 1000 excuses not to do it and I gotta take ONE action, just do it. <Bam>
  8. with My value of love, I loved to work in our garden, with my music, took care of our plants and it looked neat. <Yeah!>
  9. with My value of care,  My back nagged and I gotta stop. I listened to my body and I was my Prio one person. Job done and it was time to chill out.
  10. with My value of love, a little boy re-united with his fav cuddle piglet, it was a long night I guessed and I was happy for them to find each other.
  11. with My value of joy, we had our MONdate, just the 2 of us and it was peaceful and joyful.
  12. with My value of care, I prepared my lunch for the coming week, quinoa, green asparagus, chick peas, tofu, mushroom and soya. I was a happy girl.
  13. with My value of care,  I felt like a 3 yo, I needed a nap and I just did it.
  14. with My value of love, tickets are reserved, we had our movie date and thank you so much.
  15. with My value of fun, it was a great movie and we had fun.

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