Why Having kids?

{Just A Thought}
They embrace the impermanence of life. – Just because something doesn’t last forever, doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth me while.  I know this to be true – everything has a time and place.  Relationships, jobs and experiences are all part of a bigger plan.  As I grow older, I begin to realize what I need and what I need to leave behind.  Sometimes there are things in my life that aren’t meant to stay.  Sometimes the changes I don’t want are the changes I need to grow.  And sometimes walking away is a step forward.

{My Successes}

  1. with My value of care, it was a  tropical day, I had a good night rest and my day was great.
  2. with My value of joy, we hanged out, just the 2 of us and it was amazing.
  3. with My value of commitment, I was a hungry bear, we went to this bagel place and I enjoyed this yummy bagel with wide salmon filet. <nom nom>
  4. with My value of fun, I didn’t understand what she nagged about, she nagged to her kids and it was funny to see the language of moms. My question was ” why do people want kids?” “why do people make these little monsters to torture themselves? “
  5. with My value of fun, when I was in the restaurant, I saw this little human, she walked like a cute, drunk little person and she smiled at me. <Again, I was really on fire when it came to kids>I asked her an adult question, “how are you today,sweetie? I like your minnie mouse T-shirt.” the only answer I got ” mouse, mouse and mom mom ” I absolutely refused to talk like idiot with baby words and I loved our conversation and her smile. She was inspiring and creative.
  6. with My value of fun, I was in a book store and I loved these books <and the smell of books> What did I meet? Yes, a charming baby boy in his buggy. I heard this noise “ku ku ka ka” or something, I looked at him and smiled. Then I heard more “ku ku ka ka” and laughed. Oh my, this boy was flirting with me, I waved to him and blew him a kiss and he laughed like a mad man. My heart melted and thank you for the big smile.
  7. with My value of joy, I had my favorite gelato > Mango! Oh yes, I was a happy girl.
  8. with My value of dare, I totally disliked these shopping style and I disliked tarts. I spoke up and I left this store. It wasn’t the last dress in this place, just relax, ladies!
  9. with My value of inspiration, I had my story to tell “why I don’t have kid?” Thanks for the lovely kids I met in the last few days.

{Why I don’t have kid?}
Why have kids? I understand the evolutionary pull of procreation, I get that some women to most women have “the urge,” but the logical side of my brain can’t grasp why. (it doesn’t make sense sometimes, the best things in life so many times are illogical — take love, for example).
Creating kids contribute to human race survival. I agree to this one, yet not everyone obliged to do so, especially with current exploding population to 7 billion living persons. Do they have anything better to do than fucking and giving birth? 

8 weeks ago I had this hysterectomy, I am unable to bear a baby anymore and I don’t regret my decision. When I didn’t do this, I would have other health issue later on. It is my decision and no one forced me to do this. I need to live my life in my best expectation.

From my first memories, I knew I myself wanted children one day. I loved taking care of my little sisters, nieces and nephews, I started babysitting as soon as I was old enough and I was the eldest in my family. I saw myself as a leader, a young adult with responsibility and a role model.  I had fun to be a leader of the pack and I got many trouble too.  
To this day babies make me coo, caw, talk funny and feel warm inside. I married a man I love and can see us developing a life together, and that life undoubtedly includes children. But my educational background is in applied science, so the logical side of me just can’t understand why I want to raise children. They’re extremely expensive, at times frustrating, have the potential to wreck havoc on your marriage (and your body), and many times don’t even appreciate all the sacrifices parents make for them. But yet, I love being around them, I love seeing their progress, am amazed at how quickly children learn and grow, and view having a baby a very special gift.

In one situation, the trainer asked me “are you thinking of having kids?” I told her directly “No”.  I was terrified of the thought, and that my life was perfect as it was, and that I really wasn’t comfortable around infants and I enjoyed my life — I was planning to wait until I was more certain. When? I am not ready to give up many things : my wonderful sleep, hang out with my friends and doing what I like. I love my life right as it is.

The common answer of my parent-friends “why they have kids”, their kid’s loveliness makes them (parents) happy, but I don’t see the indispensability of this happiness. Happiness? I would say sleep deprivation, they dominate their freedom at least for 18 years, they kill their fun time and they demand their care 24/7. Have fun folks! My definition of happiness is hell different from theirs.

The other point of view for having kid is: the kids can take care of their parents when they grow old and keep them from being lonely. Is it true? I also wondered why many seniors are lonely in the home and where are their kids?
I have also heard that kids add freshness to the family, that’s why many couples don’t stop having kids. My question now,  is it rather because they get bored by themselves in life and cannot find a way to have fun? 
Am I the stupid one now who have no kids? No one will gotta take care of me, I will be lonely when I get older. Who will know what it will happen in 20, 30 years? I can’t even answer this.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s